The Worst Week Ever
by Akutoresu
Summary: Jack and Will make a bet and the loser has to be a slave to the winner for the entire week. If they refuse, they have to wear a dress. Who will win the bet and what hilarity ensues throughout the week? Rated T just in case please review!
1. Introduction

This is a parody of Pirates of the Caribbean. It's extremely funny. This first chapter is only an introduction and isn't as funny as the rest are going to be. Each chapter is a day and the next chapter will be Sunday just to make it nice and even, if you know what I mean. PLEASE REVIEW!! On to the story…

Jack and Will sat across from each other on Will's ship _The Flying Dutchman._ "I would be able to make Elizabeth fall for me first, for about a second, before you ya know. After all, she does love me…" Jack said, smirking at Will. They were apparently in the middle of an argument.

"Oh, really? That's _**exactly**_ why she married me instead of you right? I could easily make her fall for me first. I am, after all, her _**husband.**_" Will replied, rubbing it in Jack's face because he knew Jack hated the fact that Will was married to Elizabeth. "And just for the record, she doesn't love you." Will finished.

Jack quickly came up with a witty answer to reply with. "She must have been drunk to marry you. You are a eunuch after all. And just for the record, she does too love me. Why else would she start kissing me when the Kraken attacked me ship?" Jack replied with a smirk, then shuddered at the memory of jumping into the Kraken's mouth. Will saw him shudder and laughed.

"What's so funny?" Jack asked, offended for he knew why Will was laughing. "Nothing, nothing. I guess I shouldn't keep talking about the Kraken…" he purposely added in as he knew what the latter result would be. Jack shuddered again when he heard the word 'Kraken.' Will laughed again and Jack glared at him. William stopped laughing and decided to continue the argument instead.

"For the last time, Jack, I am NOT a eunuch!! She doesn't love you. She kissed you so she could leave you there to die." A smirking Will said, feeling his victory in the air.

Jack quickly tried to stay away from that subject, but still stay in the argument, as he was determined to win this one. "Doesn't matter why. Sparrow charm will bring her back, I know it." Said Sparrow himself. Will cocked an eyebrow. "Sparrow charm?" Jack nodded. Will shook his head. "You're too conceited for your own good, you know that?" Jack smiled. "Not my choice of words, but, yes."

"Anyways, 'sparrow charm' will not work. Elizabeth would rather go for her husband than a pirate that threatened her once upon a time."

"I rather hoped we were past me threatening her. Are you willing to bet on who gets to her first?" Will smiled. "Seeing as that I would win, yes."

Jack smirked. "We'll see about that. If I win, you live on _The Black Pearl_ with me and be my slave for one week." Will countered Jack's attack on him. "If I win, it's vise versa on _The Flying Dutchman _with me as Captain, of course."

"Deal."

"Deal." They shook on it. They stared at each other for a few moments. "One…" Jack said. "Two…" Will followed. Jack paused, then shouted, "Three!!" They both got up from their seats and ran up the stairs to find dear Elizabeth. Jack found her first and wrapped his arm around the unsuspecting lady. "Hello darling, ye look lovely might I say."

"Jack, _**what **_ are you doing?!" She noticed Jack's arm around her and pushed it off of her, taking Jack by surprise. "Jack, I know what you're trying to do, but I told you once before, I love Will. I married him and I only kissed you that one time so you would get eaten by the-" she stopped her sentence knowing Jack will shudder. She had more of a heart than Will did for poor Jack. Jack put a hand over his heart as if protecting it. "That hurt…" he said, mentioning Elizabeth's statement saying she wanted him to get killed.

Will walked over to the duo. "There you are my beautiful wife." He said as she friendly kissed him. Jack's heart sank and his face fell in defeat.

"ugh…" he groaned. Will noticed this and smirked. "Told you so. That's why she married me." Elizabeth knew what was going on. She had watched them as they were making the bet, but they didn't know that. Jack tried to hide his defeat. "Oh, well. Congratulations on winning. Now I'll be heading back to me ship if ye don't mind." Jack started walking away but, as if a reflex, William quickly grabbed Jack's shoulder and spun him around so that they were facing each other. Will's smirk grew.

"Not so fast, Jack. We made a deal, remember? You have to stay here on my ship, and be my personal servant for the _**entire week.**_**" **He said, rubbing it in. Jack moaned. "Alright fine!!" he whined and purposely shuddered to shake Will's hand off his shoulder. Will laughed again.

"I was only doing that to get yer hand off of me." An angry Jack said. "I know Jack. It's still amusing." Will replied. Jack's eyes turned into tiny slits as he glared icily at Will. "Jack!" Elizabeth said and Jack's eyes widened at her. "What?" "STOP!!" she said. Jack gave up. He knew better than to be on Elizabeth's bad side.

Will turned to face Elizabeth. "Elizabeth, Jack and I-" Elizabeth cut him off when he started to explain what was going on. "I know. I saw you arguing." Jack's eyes went wide. "Ye knew about the bet and STILL didn't give in to me?!?!?!" Elizabeth gave him a disgusted look. Will broke their 'battle of the evil looks.' "Jack, meet me in my quarters to discuss the rules. " Jack groaned again. "Rules? There's rules? I don't like the sound of that…" Jack and Will leave.

The Rules 

Jack sat in a chair across from Will, sitting in another chair, with a table in between them. "Okay, about these rules…?" Jack asked. Will had forgotten for a second then quickly remembered. "Oh, right. Rule number one, no rum."

Jack nearly screamed. "WHAT?!?!" he yelled instead. To him there was a difference. "No rum." Will repeated. Elizabeth came down the stairs just as Jack was about to say something. "I was curious about the rules. Pretend I'm not here. What did I miss?"

"No rum." Will said and Elizabeth nodded. Jack glared at him as he said the words. "I hate this already."

"I thought you would. That's why I picked it. Elizabeth, there's a chair next to me." Elizabeth sat down in the chair in between Jack and Will. "I'll make sure I'm invisible." She swore. Will laughed a little. Jack would have too if he wasn't so mad. Will cleared his throat. "Rule number 2, don't break the rules"

"What kind of pointless rule is that?!"

"I couldn't think of another rule…and there has to be more than one." Jack sighed at Will's comment. "Any more rules…?" he asked. "No, but I must tell you something. It's more like a threat than a rule." Jack gulped. "What is it…?" he asked then regretted it when Will showed him. He pulled out a pink frilly dress. Elizabeth and Jack looked at him weird. "If you break any of these rules, go back to your ship, or refuse to do something that I tell you to do, then you have to sail your ship in front of your crew in this." Elizabeth burst out laughing then stopped. "Sorry, I'm supposed to be invisible."

"It's okay, I know you couldn't resist. Jack, dress or bet?" Jack stared at him wide-eyed for a moment, then shouted in a reply, completely struck with fear, as you can tell in his voice. "I'LL DO ANYTHING YE SAY, I PROMISE!!!!!!!!!" He said clasping his hands together as a sign that he was in debt to Will. Will smiled. "Deal?" Jack was still stricken with fear. "Yes, yes! Deal! Deal!!" Jack said quickly. There was a silence for a moment, then Elizabeth spoke up. "I hope you don't mind me not being invisible, but I must say, I wouldn't be able to imaging the infamous Captain Jack Sparrow in a dress." She said. Jack thought about his crew's reactions if he had given in to Will and shuddered much to Will's amusement as he started laughing and Elizabeth looked intrigued. "Do that again!" She said, smiling. "Do what again?" Jack asked. "That thing before. After I starting talking about the dress. I think it was a shudder." She explained. Jack gave her a confused look. "Why would I want to do that again?"

"I like it, it's funny." She said, beginning to grow impatient.

"No." Jack replied stubbornly. "Yes!" Elizabeth demanded. "No! Besides, it's a reflex. I can't just shudder whenever I feel like it! Well, I can, but it wouldn't be the same thing." Jack said. Elizabeth thought for a moment, then smirked. "What?" Jack didn't like that look. "I think it was very heroic that day when the **Kraken** attacked." She said purposely, and much to her enjoyment, her goal was accomplished. Jack glared at her as she laughed. When she calmed down, Will began to speak. "Let's get started then. Give me your rum." Jack didn't hesitate, thinking about the dress but holding back a shudder due to their last conversation.

He put all of the rum he had on him on the table and handed it to Will. Will was surprised to see that Jack could fit twelve bottles of rum in his coat. Will took the rum and threw it out the window and into the sea. "You didn't have to waste all that rum….." Jack nearly cried. "Yes I did." Will said. Jack took one final reply, "This is going to be a _**Long**_ week…."

Yay! First chap is finished! I know I put a lot of pointless stuff in there, but that is the whole reason for these kind of fics, isn't it? Anyways, Please review and hop you like the next chapter! Bye!

**Signed,**

Captain Chartman 


	2. Sunday

Well…it seemed that people liked the first Chapter so I decided to update for your amusement. Special thanks to my reviewers. Hope you like this Chapter! Without any further ado…

Jack woke up to hear a loud horn in his ear. "What the hell?!" he yelled. Will had forced him to sleep on the deck, so none of the crew had woken. The only ones awake were Jack and…"Good morning, Jack."…Will, the owner of the horn. "What do ye think you are doing?! Are ye out of yer mind?! What time is it?!" Will was hit with Jack's questions. "Yes, I know exactly what I am doing. No I am not out of my mind. It's about 4am"

"4AM?!?!?! ARE YOU INSANE?!"

"For the last time, I haven't lost my mind and I know what I am doing."

"Okay, smarty. If ye know what ye are doing, why don't ye tell me why you woke me up at bloody 4am!!"

"You'll be making breakfast for the crew today."

"What?! I can't cook!!"

"Learn. Why do you think I woke up so early?" Jack thought for a minute then sighed. "Ye knew I was going to make a lot of mistakes."

"You're very observant." Will pointed out. Jack glared at him. "Well? What are you waiting for? Get to work!" Jack started to get up but Will stopped him. "What are you doing?" Jack stared at him blankly. "What you told me to do…" "I didn't mean now!" "But you just said…"

"No I didn't!" Jack gave up. Will did this kind of thing to him all night last night and Jack knew he couldn't win these kinds of arguments. "Before you go, I have to tell you this. Serve Elizabeth's breakfast in bed. Be warned, she is a huge critic and you will probably make hers over and over again until noon." Jack rolled his eyes. "Great…" he mumbled to himself. "Well, GO!" Will said as if it was obvious. Jack went below deck. Will started making his way below deck, when Jack came running up the steps and stopped Will. Will gave him a 'What now?' look and Jack gave Will a helpless look. "Um…Where exactly will I be completing this task?" he asked hesitantly. Will rolled his eyes and pointed in the direction to the kitchen. Jack thanked him and went on his way.

XXX 

"Is this good enough?" Jack asked, exhausted, as he handed Elizabeth a tray of food for the billionth time. He had been serving, preparing, cooking, making, and most importantly, disposing of Elizabeth's breakfast from 5am (he used the first hour to prepare the crew's meal) until 11am. Elizabeth never seemed to be satisfied. Jack was a mess from doing so much work and Will was already disappointed from the crew's reaction to Jack's cooking skills. Jack just explained by saying 'I told you so' mentioning when he said he couldn't cook.

Elizabeth took a bite of her 50th prepared breakfast. She frowned at Jack snobbishly. "Too chewy. Be sure not to overcook it next time." Jack sighed from being too tired. "Next time?" he moaned. "I've been working on yers the entire mornin' from four am. Besides, it's already a quarter to twelve, dontcha think it's a little late fer breakfast?" he said, ready to collapse on the bed Elizabeth was in. Elizabeth sighed.

"Alright, fine. Will isn't going to be very happy with this though…" she added. Jack woke up, as if he was sleeping. "No! No! Don't tell him I failed, please! It's me first day, just tell him that I succeeded! I won't let ye down again!" he said with his hands together to add to the pleading look. Elizabeth sighed again. "Alright, fine. Only because it's your first day, though. This better not happen again!" she said and Jack clasped his hands together as a thank you and left with the tray of untouched food.

Once on deck, he threw the breakfast overboard. If you didn't know any better, you would say a quarter of the ocean was made up of Elizabeth's breakfast. He leaned against the railing and started to drift off. It was 12:00 noon and he's already been up for eight hours. He's also been working the entire morning. He started to fall asleep until an unknown source tapped his shoulder. He jumped and spun around quickly to find a crewmember he didn't know. Luckily, Will and Elizabeth weren't around, or else they would be laughing their heads off after Jack jumped. Luckily, they weren't there, and Jack almost took a sigh of relief, but he realized that taking a random sigh of relief would be kind of awkward to this crewmember he was now facing.

"Is that yer 40th breakfast in the ocean?" The crewmember mocked him. Jack wasn't fully awake enough to realize he was being mocked. "I dunno, maybe. Maybe even more. Lizzie left me off da hook so I don't hafta do anymore…" Jack said, all hints of drowsiness in his voice. The crewmember smirked. "Oh, this will be an interesting story for Captain Will…" he said. Jack winced when he said 'Captain Will.' It just didn't have a ring to it like 'Captain Jack' did. Jack quickly got back to his senses and waved his hands in the air. "No! Don't tell him!!"

"Why not?" Jack thought for a minute for a reason why not. "Because I am only here for a week and if you tell him that Liz was not happy then I will make this the worst week you ever had!!"

"So?! If I tell the Captain then he will make this the worst week _**you**_ ever had!" Jack looked down. "Fine. Tell him. But he'll believe Lizzie before you…"

"Not if I get there first!" The crewmember started heading to the Captain's quarters. "Oh, no you don't!" Jack yelled and pulled out his sword. The crewmember pulled out his and they fought.

XXX

The sword fight had last almost an hour now. Occasionally, they would get an audience, but no crewmember in the audience ever rooted for Jack. They didn't even know the guy!

Both of them were getting exhausted. For Jack, that would be _**hugely**_ exhausted, because he was ready to pass out before they started fighting. Elizabeth didn't want to watch. Not because they were sword fighting, neither of them could die, but because both their shirts were clinging to them as if they weren't wearing a shirt, and she didn't want Will to be upset with her for staring. Silly thing, you might say.

During their sword fight, they were also having an insult fight. "Just give up, you eunuch!" Jack snapped. He really didn't want to fight anymore. He was way too tired. "If you don't wanna fight then just stop, you wanna-be pirate!" Jack swung his sword over the head of the crewmember as he dodged it by ducking.

Fifteen minutes later, Will came by to see what all the fuss was about after another member of the crew informed him that two people were fighting. He wasn't informed on whom.

He ran up the steps and onto the deck. He pushed and shoved into the crowd until he was standing right before them. They failed to notice, they kept throwing swords and insults at each other. "You lose a bet and suddenly lose your title as Captain you weakling!" The crewmember said and tried to stab Jack but he backed away to dodge it. "You're too low to even have a title as Captain in the first place and have to serve under a eunuch!!" Jack said and swung his sword but it clashed with the other sword that was flying around.

"Jack, how many times must I tell you that I am NOT a eunuch!!" Will said, and they both stopped and faced him. "What's going on?"

"HE STARTED IT!!!" The crewmember pointed at Jack. "What?!" Jack exclaimed. "You did! You told me not to go further and pulled out your sword!"

"Only because you threatened me!!"

"You didn't have to have someone else lie for you in the first place!!"

"Yes I did! He'd believe Liz's lie more than mine, aye?!"

"But this is still your fault!"

"IS NOT!"

"IS TOO!"

"IS NOT!"

"IS TOO!!"

Will rolled his eyes at them. "Alright, alright! Crew, get back to work, except for Jack and Bo'sun." Jack and Bo'sun put their swords away and stopped arguing. "You two are like children." Will began. "Why did this start?"

"Well, because-" Bo'sun began. Jack knew he was going to expose him, so he put his hand over his mouth. "I. Will. Tell." He said. Bo'sun glared at him. Jack took his hand away so he could give visuals with both his hands like he naturally does when he talks. "THIS one-"Jack said, pointing at Bo'sun. "tapped me on the shoulder when I was leaning on the rail-"

"_**Sleeping**_ on the rail." Bo'sun corrected with a smirk. Jack blushed a little. "ahem. Anyways, when I turned to face him, he started mocking me, and put in a threat so I challenged him in a sword fight. And then you ruined it."

"Because you called me a eunuch."

"Yes."

"Now why would Bo'sun randomly decide to mock you instead of anyone else on the crew?"

"I don't know. Maybe because I'm new here and a lot of the crew isn't accepting me on yer ship. Maybe I should go back on me own…"

"No, this is only day one of the bet." Just then, it started raining. "Come down in my quarters and we'll discuss this." Will said. They followed him below deck.

**The Interrogation**

Will sat in a chair at a desk across from Jack and Bo'sun. "So here is the story I have so far." Will said. "Jack fell asleep at the rail, Bo'sun woke Jack up and started mocking and threatening him, and then you swordfight until I break it up."

"That is right." Jack said. "Why were you asleep at the rail?" Will asked. "Wouldn't you be tired if it was noon and you've already been up for _**eight hours**_ working your ass off? By the way, NEVER MAKE ME DO THAT AGAIN!!"

"……..ah." Will said. "Well, it's not like your going to get any sleep tonight anyways…" Jack gulped. "What?"

"It's raining pretty hard. I don't think it's going to stop until tomorrow morning." Will said. Bo'sun looked at Jack. "What does rain have to do with it? Does the Captain make you sleep on the deck?" he asked, smirking. "Well wouldn't _**you**_ like to know." Jack said, folding his arms across his chest.

"Alright, enough!" Will broke up their fighting. Jack and Bo'sun looked at him. Will sat back in his chair, intrigued by his next question. "What was the threat?"

"What?" Jack's eyes went wide and he gulped. "What was the threat Bo'sun gave you?"

"Before Jack says anything, I must tell ye that he threatened me first." Bo'sun said. Will's eyes went back to Jack. Jack had an idea. "Why did you threaten him and what was the threat?"

"He was mocking me too much for my content so I told him I was only going to be here for a week, and If he keeps doing that then I will make this the worst week he's eva had." Jack smiled as he unraveled his master work to Will. Will wasn't smiling. "So how did he threaten you?"

"He said he'd tell you something that, might I add, _**was not true,**_ and then you would make this the worst week I eva had."

"That's true, I probably would."

"That's cruel…." Jack put his hand over his heart.

"What were you going to tell me?" Will asked Bo'un. Bo'sun gave Jack a smirk before turning back to Will. "By the way, what I was going to tell you, was true. Jack didn't want you to know. I was going to tell you that Elizabeth let Jack off the hook. He was on the railing dumping yet another breakfast and then dozed off. He took out his sword after I was about to walk away to tell you."

"But, Elizabeth said that she had a fairly good breakfast this morning…"

"She was covering because Jack _**begged**_ her to forgive him."

"Ah, now I see." Will looked at Jack. Jack gulped. "You don't belive him do you? You'd believe him over your wife?!"

"My wife doesn't feel right about my bossing you around or about the bet at all so it would actually make sense for her to let you off the hook. Now I need to give you another task…"

"Oh, no, not another task!!" Jack put his head down. "I'm so exhausted it's taking all me energy just to speak…"

"Well next time don't use Elizabeth to your advantage…" Jack glared at Will. Bo'sun was smirking and Jack saw this out of the corner of his eye. "I. Hate. You."

"Same here. I'm going to enjoy this week." Jack groaned.

"Okay, enough in my quarters. Both of you get out, Kraken." Bo'sun looked at Will, confused, until Jack shuddered and Will started laughing along with Bo'sun, who wasn't laughing as much. "STOP DOING THAT!!!!! It's not that funny!" Jack whined.

"Yes, it is. Now leave me." Will said. They both left. "I love Sundays…"

**Okay, this was day one! I hope you liked it and please review!**

**Captain Chartman**


	3. Monday

I got such good reviews that encouraged me to show what happens on Monday in hell. Well, Jack's idea of hell at least. Thanks for the reviews and keep sending 'em! On to the story…

**Disclaimer: I own nothing now leave me alone.**

Jack sighed. Monday. Everyone hates Mondays, and this Monday was definitely going to be the worst. _Well, at least the whelp didn't wake me up at 4am today. Well, I don't know that yet, I'm still sleeping. Guess I should get up now…_ Jack thought and opened his eyes to see a bunch of people surrounding him. "…What…?"

"Do you know what time it is?" an unknown crewmember asked. "Not 4am that's for sure." Jack said with a smile. His smile soon faded to see that everyone had an impatient expression. "It's 1:30 in the afternoon." The crewman said. "Oh. So I'm off by a few hours…"

"You've been in the way of the crew's work all mornin'!"

"Why didn't ya wake me up if it bothered ya so much?"

"You're a very heavy sleeper…the real question is why the bloody hell are you dozing off on the deck?!"

"Captain made me sleep here."

"Why are you here?"

"Lost a bet. Now can I have some personal space, please?" Jack stood up only to be backed up against the railing. "Watch yerself." One crewmember said. _….heh….._ Jack thought. Will came up to him. "Good! You're up! Come downstairs with me." Will led him downstairs.

"I only have one task for you today…" Jack's face lit up. "Only one! Yay!"

"It's a big one." Jack's face fell. "At least you didn't wake me up at bloody 4am this time. I liked the darkness…(sleep) even through the rain."

"Well it's a good thing you like darkness."

"Why?"

"Close your eyes."

"Why?"

"Just do it." Jack sighed and heard some shuffling going on in the distance, then footsteps coming towards him. "Open." Will said. Jack opened his eyes to still see darkness. "What did you do?"

"You're blind for the day."

"I'm WHAT?!"

"Blind. Try working with the crew while still being blind. This will be very amusing for Elizabeth and me."

"The crew hates me already just fer sleepin' on the deck! What if I bump into someone and they pull out a sword, I'll never know!!"

"Then you better get used to it." Will said sarcastically. "Now go up the stairs and start working. Jack sighed before attempting to go up the stairs with Will following. He tripped on every step and Will laughed followed by a "shut up!" by Jack. They finally made it up on the deck.

Every one stopped working and glared at Jack. Jack didn't see but noticed that there was no noise. "What's going on? Is there anyone here?"

"Of course we're here, ye idiot. What are you blind?" a random crewmember snapped. "Well, yes I am." They stared waiting for him to continue. "You're eunuch of a Captain told me to close my eyes, when he tells me to open them there's darkness and he said that I am blind for the day." Jack explained. Will smiled, as if proud. "stop smiling." Jack said. Will looked at him. "How did you know I was smiling?"

"I didn't, I was wondering if you would tell me." Will glared at him. "Okay, now I know yer glarin' at me." Will continued to glare then looked at the crew who were staring at their quarrel. "What? Work! And remember that Jack is blind so try your best to keep in your anger." Some of the crew nodded but most did nothing as they went back to work. "Jack…" Will began, noticing Jack's posture. "What now?" Jack asked angrily. "You don't have to keep your hands in front of you like that…" Jack noticed he had his arms stretched out in front of him and quickly made them fall to his side. Will laughed. "Good luck." He said and pretended to walk away, when he really just sat down next to Elizabeth to watch the show. "Bloody eunuch…" Jack said. Will ignored him to keep up the image that he walked away.

See no evil: On deck 

Will gave Jack a few things to do on the deck with the crew. Though, the crew had their eyesight at least. The first task was the hardest one. The actual task wasn't hard, but getting through the crew 'blindfolded,' was indeed difficult. He had to steer the ship to Port Royal so Elizabeth could return, but the wheel was all the way on the other side of the ship. Jack gulped before he took a step forward.

He stepped on someone's foot. Predictable. The crewmember stared down at him with an angry face, Jack didn't know this fact until he felt the guy's breath. "Watch where yer goin'!" The crew guy said and Jack tried to smile. "I'm blind, remember? Didn't see ya." The man snorted and left angry at Jack. Jack took a few sighs to try and calm himself, for he knew that he was probably going to get killed by the crew.

Bo'sun saw Jack in the corner of his eye and smirked. He walked up behind him and grabbed his shoulder, making Jack let out a small scream before turning around to face his 'opponent' or so he thought he was. "Whatcha sighing to yerself for?" Jack knew this voice was his enemy's. Bo'sun.

Jack folded his arms across his chest. "No reason."

"Why are ya walkin' inta every one?"

"I'm blind and can't see where I'm going." Jack said. He then regretted it, thinking that Bo'sun might try something. He did try something. Bo'sun thought for a minute before having an idea. A loud thump was heard and shook the whole ship, from someone handling the cannons wrong. Jack panicked as it reminded him of something. "…What was that…?" he asked no one in particular. Bo'sun smirked and tried to act frightened, much to his satisfaction, his voice really sounded frightened.

"Lord on high…The Kraken!" Jack went wide-eyed and started panicking. "The Kraken?! Where are the boats?!"

"They've all been broken by the Kraken! It's after you, Jack!"Much to Bo'sun's enjoyment Jack looked completely stricken with fear. Will was walking up to them to break it up, he knew this was too much for poor Jack. He was walking up behind Jack and Bo'sun saw him. When Will was right behind Jack, ready to tap his shoulder, Bo'sun continued his little game and yelled. "Jack! One of its tentacles is right behind you!!" Out of pure instinct, Jack took out his sword and stabbed the 'tentacle,' which actually came out to be Will's jacket, to the mast. He let go of his sword and it stayed attached to the mast, leaving Will pinned to it. Will didn't want to let Jack off the hook now, but he still wanted to end Bo'sun's game.

"Jack! What the hell?!"

"William?" Jack turned around to face Will, then remembered that he couldn't see if his ears were lying to him. He was blind. "Will was that you?"

"Yes, that was me. You pinned me to the mast with your sword!"

"What? But I thought…" Will sighed. "Bo'sun lied to you, Jack. The Kraken isn't here, and I am not a tentacle. He was just taking advantage of your blindness, try not to be so gullible." For once, Will did not burst out laughing when Jack shuddered at the word Kraken.

Jack turned around to face Bo'sun. "You _**what?**_" he fumed.

"I was just playin' with ya." Bo'sun replied carelessly. "I wish I could fight ya right now…" Jack said. "…but I'm _**blind!**_" Jack said loudly so Will could hear. Will winced. "Why are ya blind anyways?"

"Why should I tell _**you?**_" Jack said childishly. Bo'sun turned to Will and asked him the same question. "Did Jack tell you about the bet?" Bo'sun jumped as he remembered. "Oh, right! This Is only day two of Sparrow hell!!" he said.

"_**Sparrow hell?**_" Jack said the name again. "That is a good way to describe it, aye?" Bo'sun smiled.  
"No, not really." Jack said. Bo'sun shrugged and left. Once Jack heard that Bo'sun was gone, Jack turned back to Will with a pleading look on his face. "Take away the blindness and give me my vision back!! I hate this task it's worse than anything I've ever done before! Well, except jumping I the mouth of the, well, you know…"

"Kraken?" Will asked and smiled as Jack shuddered. "Yes, that. Now take it back I don't want it."

"Duh, you don't want it, who would? I'm not taking it away though. You deserve every bit of this."

"…Well, how do I reverse it?!"

"Well, there is a reversal potion that you have to drink…"

"Where?!"

"Calm down, geez. It's in the cargo hold with about 50 other potions. Take only a sip though, or you could, well, die. I know you're already dead but it'll be very painful, trust me."

"Okay, well get it for me."

"No. Get it yourself. You have a compass that points to what you want most in the world, that should lead you to it easily." Will said as he took Jack's sword out from the mast, freeing himself. He handed Jack his sword and started to walk away. Jack still stared. "BUT I WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE WHERE THE COMPASS POINTS!!!!!!!" Will snickered and headed down to the cargo hold with Elizabeth to watch the show. He knew what was going to happen next. Jack followed him.

The potions 

Will and Elizabeth sat down on the floor as Jack felt all the different bottles of unknown potions that could do who knows what. There were a lot. This was going to take a while…

"Have fun." Will said, relaxing. Jack turned around. "You're here? To watch the show I imagine."

"Yepp. Now go on…" Elizabeth said. Jack rolled his eyes and took out his compass. He opened it and waited, then he realized something. "What am I doing? I can't even see where this bloody thing points!!" He put the compass away and grabbed a random bottle. "Well, here goes…" He unwillingly drank a sip of the bottle.

**Poof**

Elizabeth put her hands over her mouth and Will stared at him wide eyed. "What did it do? It definitely didn't give me my vision back."

Elizabeth spoke up. "Jack you're…blonde." She shuddered. "Your not exactly a hot blonde, drink something else to distract me!"

"Gladly!" Jack said, trying to erase the image of blonde Captain Jack Sparrow from his mind. He grabbed a purple bottle and took a sip.

**Poof**

"Well, that should do it!" Elizabeth said. Jack's blonde hair was gone. "What am I now?"

"I must say Jack, you make a cute teenager…" Elizabeth said. "TEENAGER?! AAAAHH!!" he quickly grabbed another bottle and drank it. "Okay, what am I now?"

"Hello, down there!!" Will mocked. "Down there? Okay, what happened…?"

"You shrunk." Elizabeth replied. They heard a faint squeak that turned out to be a scream. Jack ran the mile to the bottles and tried to grab another. "Since…when did…these bottles…get…so…HEAVY?!" the one he was trying to grab tipped over and he took a tiny sip from it. He was now normal size. "Oh, wow! IT WORKED!! I CAN SEE!!" Jack said, overjoyed. Will and Elizabeth groaned and Jack glared at them. "Well, I'm so sorry that I ruined your show."

"That's okay, there's always tomorrow." Will smiled. Jack's face fell and his eyes widened.

"T…tomorrow? Oh, no…"

Hope you liked Monday! What's funny is, I wrote this one on a Monday! –shifty eyes- Anyways, keep sending reviews and I'll make another chapter!!

**Captain Chartman**


	4. Post Tuesday

Hi! I was encouraged to make another chapter. So here it is, POST TUESDAY!!! This isn't real Tuesday because this is kind of a drama thing that I thought of and it fit nicely into this story so I decided to put it in. It's not humor and next chapter is the real Tuesday.

_Oh, god, I'm not blind again am I?! NOOO!! _Jack thought while he had his eyes closed on the deck. _Wait, I'm not blind, I'm sleeping. Wait, that means that…oh, no another day in 'Sparrow Hell' as my worst enemy likes to call it._ Jack opened his eyes and quickly went below deck to avoid the crew. He ran straight into Will.

"Hello, Jack." Will said. He had the same expression as Jack did. "Um…hello eu-Will." Will smirked and Jack knew what was coming for him. Jack sighed. "What is it today?" he asked in a bored tone. Will's smirk disappeared. "Why, that's a good question…I don't know…"

"You…don't…know…?" Jack's face lit up. Will threw a cloth at Jack and he caught it. "What's this?"

"Um, you know, just swab the decks below in the brig." Jack's eyes went angry so much you would think they turned red. "No."

"What?"

"No. I am Captain Jack Sparrow, the most fearsome pirate captain in the Caribbean, and I will not stoop down to the level of a deckhand." Will paused for a moment then looked towards another cabin. "Hey, Liz! Where'd you put that dress?" Jack gulped. He had forgotten about the deal they had made in case he refused.

"There's no need for that, see? I'm going, going!!" he compromised and went out the door and down the stairs to the brig.

There was only one person in the cell. Jack ignored her and went on to 'swabbing the deck' whether it was a deck or not. The woman in the cell walked up to the bars and looked at Jack. Jack stopped. "Yes?" Jack asked impatiently.

"Jack Sparrow?" Jack looked up at her. "You know me?"

"Of course I know you." She paused. "Don't you remember me?"

Jack thought for a moment. He looked closer at her then his eyes went wide. "M…Monika…?" he said slowly.

"Oh, you do remember! Oh this is wonderful!!" Jack stood up and took a step back. He looked at her. She was the same as he could remember. She had blonde hair, tied up in a sloppy bun. She had glistening blue eyes with a lot of blue eyeliner to surround them. She wore blue lipstick to match with her 'blue look.' To finish it off she wore a blue tortuga-style dress.

"What are you doing here?"

"On this ship? I needed to get away from Tortuga. I started a riot there and I was wanted so I saw this ship in the distance and swam to it. The Captain wanted to drop me off at Tortuga but I told him I refused. He was too nice to throw me overboard, so he put me here."

"How long have you been here?"

"About a week." There was an awkward silence between them. "So…"

Monika sighed. She hoped that she was wrong. She knew what was coming next.

"How…is…Johnny…?"

"He's not with me and he never was!"

"Don't deny what I saw."

"I won't but I don't love him!!"

"Then why did you make out with him?!"

Monika paused. "I don't know."

"You don't know." Jack left. "Wait! Jack!! I can explain!!" Jack stopped on the stairs. "There's no explaining needed." He said and continued to walk up the stairs. He walked over to Will and slammed the cloth into his hand. Will noticed the anger and frustration in Jack's eyes.

"Jack, it couldn't have been that bad. It's over now."

"Why didn't you tell me that you had a prisoner down there?!"

"Monika?" Jack winced but Will continued. "I didn't think it was important…"

"Well it is!!" Jack left and Will went downstairs. He wanted to know what connections he had with Monika.

Will got downstairs to see Monika curled up in a ball in the corner of the cell. "Monika?" Will asked. She picked her head up quickly. "Jack?!" Her eyes looked disappointed when she saw Will. Will observed the dried up tears on her face. "What do you want?" Monika asked.

"I want to know something." He replied. Monika gulped. "What do you want to know?"

"What's with you and Jack?"

"How do you know about that?"

"He looked mad and mentioned you. So I came down here to find out what connections he had with you."

"I see."

"So what connections do you have? Did you steal his ship? Is that why he's mad?"

"No. I would do no such thing."

"Drink all the rum?"

"NO!!!!! You're wrong!!" She cried some more as she thought about the true answer of what she did to Jack.

"What happened? How do you know him?"

"……We were in love." Will paused. He couldn't imagine Jack being in love. Pirates don't love. "Jack…in love?"

"Yes. But I…I destroyed it."

"What? How?"

"Jack saw me having a good time with Johnny. Johnny is an old friend of mine and Jack was always suspicious of him. I was drunk, so I was dancing and everything. I didn't even know what I was doing, and then I kissed Johnny…"

"He saw you doing all that."

"Yes. Once I saw him watching, I got back to my senses, as if I was sober again. I chased after him trying to explain everything but he wouldn't listen. Then he left me."

"I'm sorry."

"If anyone should be sorry it should be me."

"It wasn't your fault though, Monika."

"Yes it was!!"

"How?! You just told me you were drunk!"

"I was, but I got myself drunk!" They both paused, creating a much needed silence. "I broke his heart Will, and he broke mine."

Will paused to look at her cry some more before leaving. He went up the stairs and looked for Jack. He walked over to Elizabeth. "Have you seen Jack?"

"I think he went upstairs. Why, did you think of a task?" Will stopped walking and turned around to look at her. "No, this is not about a task." He ran up the stairs and saw Jack leaning at the railing, looking at the ocean. "Jack?" No answer. "Jack?" Still no answer. "JACK!"

"Yes?" Jack said as if he heard everything Will had just said. "Jack I need to talk to you about something."

"About what exactly?" Will walked over to the rail and looked at Jack, who was still staring into the ocean. "About…Monika." Jack glanced over to him, then raised his head to look at him entirely. "What do you want to know? That she's a two-timing fraud?"

"Uh, not exactly Jack. I went down to ask her what happened between you and her, and she told me. I want to know if she was telling the truth."

"What did she tell you?"

"That you were in love."

"Go on."

"Was that the truth?"

"…maybe…"

"Jack."

"Alright, it's the truth. Now what else did she tell you?"

"She said she got drunk and was having a good time with an old friend while you were watching."

"A good time?"

"Yes."

"I didn't see that." Jack looked at Will.

"That's what she said."

"I only saw the…" he looked down.

"Kiss?"

"Yes. That." Jack said through gritted teeth.

"Well, she said she was having a good time too. But she said that she tried explaining it but you wouldn't listen."

"Well, what was there to listen to? The answer to every question I had was in what I saw."

"She also said you left her."

"I did. My ship was docked there, so I gathered up the crew and left Tortuga."

"So she was telling the truth."

"Yes, she was."

"Jack…"

"What?"

"She also said…"

"said what?"

"She said she broke your heart…"

"…"

"And that you broke hers."

"That's impossible. How can I break hers if she decided she wanted to be with someone else?"

"What about her breaking yours?"

"…Pirates don't love." Jack left. Will decided that he shouldn't follow. He also knew that Pirates do love. He agreed with Monika that they were in love. So it had to be possible.

**Okay, please review! Remember that this doesn't really have anything to do with the story, I just had this good idea and it fit nicely into this story. If you think I should make a real JackOC fic about this then please say it in a review! Thanks for reading! A real chapter will be up soon!!!!**


	5. Tuesday

I'm sorry this update took soooo long, but I went through an extreme writer's block. But, now that I got my inspiration, enjoy!

**This takes place without Monika…I've decided to turn that into a separate story that will hopefully be up soon. This Chapter is in Jack's point of view, just to make it easier.**

I can't see…Am I…Oh no, I can't be blind again! I opened my eyes quickly to confirm my nightmare, but it was wrong. Thank god…that was one of the worst experiences in my life. Apparently I rely on my vision too much.

I got up from the awkward sleeping position I was in, and quickly hurried below deck to avoid that damned crew. They hate me…for some odd reason. I never imagined anyone could hate Captain Jack Sparrow. –ahem- anyways…When I went below, I ran straight into Will. We both stumbled backward, then stared at each other, sharing the same blank expression.

Will broke the silence. "Hello, Jack."

"Hello William. I was just…uh…finding my way…to…um…"

"No need to make an excuse, I know the crew can be vicious."

"Are you implying that I was afraid of the crew?" I folded my arms across my chest and glared at the eunuch.

"I suppose. Don't you worry though, I have another task for you." I rolled my eyes when Will said this. Is that all this man thinks about? I urged him to continue.

"Jack, I would like you to do an all-nighter tonight." I cocked an eyebrow. Was he kidding?

"An all-nighter?"

"Yes."

"…of what, exactly?"

"You know, crew work, whatever. You can't sleep until two nights from now."

"…Is that the best you can think of…?"

"I have some other really cruel tasks in my mind, but it's Tuesday."

"What's so special about Tuesday?"

"That's my point. There's nothing special about Tuesday…I'll save those things for Friday and Saturday."

"Aye." I had to get away from him somehow, so I went up to the deck. I avoided eye contact with the crew as they did with me. Staying up late, is that all he wants me to do? He thinks I can't handle late hours? That's practically my middle name. He should've seen all those 'all-nighters' as he calls them, in Tortuga.This seemed to be an easy task.

10pm

Alright…right now I wish I had some rum…

I'm up on the deck, leaning against the railing, just waiting…for what you might ask. Actually, nothing. I'm not waiting for anything specific. It gets very boring up here, I've already been up for 12 hours and I'm still wide awake. That's a good thing considering I won't be able to sleep for another 24 hours.

12am

Starting to get a little drowsy, but not entirely tired. A good percent of the crew hit the sack already. I'm still bored as hell, and spent the past two hours counting the floorboards on the deck. An all-nighter seems a lot like torture for me right now…

I offered to steer the ship for Will, but he declined. He thinks I would steer it into Tortuga. That's not all I think about you know.

2am

Okay, now I'm tired, I'll admit it. The entire crew is asleep, I'm on the lonely deck all by meself. Staring out to the ocean…

Arrgh! That stupid eunuch had to win that bet!! What was I thinking? I could win over a married woman, over her husband. No way. Especially with Elizabeth, she hates me! Or so it seems…she did kiss me…But that was a kiss of death.

4am

SO

DAMN

TIRED!!!!!!!!!!

People need sleep you know! First depriving me of one of my senses, and now this! I'm going to get him back for this, definitely. The day this miserable week is over he is going to pay! I have a plan in my mind already…

6am

I'm…too tired…to talk…

"Jack…Jack…JACK!" I heard Will's voice and opened my eyes to see him. The devil…

"Jack, how long have you been sleeping?!"

"What time is it?"

"6:05"

"………5 minutes…………" That's it? Are you kidding me?! I need my damn sleep, man!!!

"How. Dare. You." I said to him with clenched teeth, struggling to stay awake.

"Cranky this morning, eh? Rough night?" I glared at him. Like he doesn't know.

"Here." He handed me a tray of…evil…breakfast. "Give this to Elizabeth."

Oh no. That would mean I'd have to use…**stairs.**

Stairs were not my friends when I was this tired. Unfortunately I cannot refuse the pest's tasks. I took the tray and stepped down the stairs. My vision was blurry from how sleep-deprived I was.

Okay, so I tripped on a few steps. Or maybe more, judging from the eunuch's laughter. I don't know exactly how I even got down the stairs in one piece.

I finally got to Elizabeth, who was still lying down in a bed…wish I was her right now. I handed her the tray, ready to collapse.

"Jack…"

"Yes………" I managed to answer in the drowsiest tone you'd ever hear.

"Are you tired at all?"

"Nah…not at all."

"Oh, okay then. I was going to give you this bed, but your not tired, so that's all."

"…" I left, purposely walking into a wall. I deserved it. Why did I say no?! No one in the world is as tired as me, and I said, no. Not at all…I hate myself right now.

I went up to the deck and leaned on the railing, which felt so much like a pillow right now.

"Jack!" Damn you Will…

"Here is a list of things that could keep you busy so you won't fall asleep."

"Why would I want that?"

He shoved it into me anyway and I looked at it for a couple seconds, then looked back at him.

"It looks like a list of jobs to me."

"Then you're very observant." He said and walked away. I glared at him as he walked. A list of jobs…this was going to be a long day…

Bo'sun started walking up to me, but I could barely hear it…didn't pay attention to it. Then he grabbed my shoulder, and noticed that I didn't turn around quickly, being all surprised. Too tired for that…

"Jacky?"

"Don't…call me…that."

"You look sick."

"I'm not sick, you idiot, just tired."

"Why?"

"Why don't you ask your so called 'Captain?'"

"Task?"

"Maybe." I folded my arms across my chest and glared at him.

"Do you still hate me?"

"Obviously…"

"Good because I still hate you too."

"Fine."

"Fine."

He walked away. I hate that man…now for this annoying list…

10pm-after the list was completed

Finally…nighttime…now I can sleep…

"Jack, what do you think you are doing?" Bloody, bloody, bloody eunuch!

"Uh, sleeping? Duh."

"What about our deal?"

"It's nighttime. The deal ends now."

"The deal ends at midnight."

"…………Bloody hell…………"

He laughed. Yeah, keep laughing, until Sunday when I make you pay. That was the longest two hours…and the longest day…I have ever been through.

**I know it wasn't that funny…or long, or anything really. I was still going through my writer's block when I wrote this, but I needed to update sometime! Ideas are much appreciated. Please review, and save me the flames, I know this wasn't the best chapter.**


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